Pickle Tickle

This is so dumb. I guess American TV is into screwing with people.



(pretend that it's not fake, which it is, in my edumakated opinion.)

Turkey Slap

I just learnt what a turkey slap is. Apparently its where a dude slaps you in the head with his man- thing. Frankly I didn't think that made any sense. I thought it more apt if a turkey slap meant a whack with a guys ballbag. You know, because the nutsac hangs like the floppy bit an a turkey. Then the gay radio station mentioned going 'gobble, gobble'... then the term made sense.

Should I be concerned?

I started planning a boat party with a friend and all of sudden it became planning for a boat party orgy :-S. What the heck happened?!

oh deary...

Here's a tip: don't EVER let attraction to a cute friend overcome your good sense :(

Gym Camp

I was in my gay gym on the cross-trainer (which i call the camperciser cos it's so camp with your hands and feet wiggling like that) and watching Antiques Roadshow on the tv, and it occured to me how gay it all was. I love it! :D

My first radio appearance

I got to speak on the gay radio station last week and the lesbian host said i was the cuuuuutest support person at the station. Lesbians seem to find me pritty. She's the 3rd one to say so. Maybe I give off lesbian pheremones. *sniffs* Do I smell like flannel?

Living stones (no, not the kind on a man)

These livingstones are cool but I suspect I'm swayed by the hot man in a towel.

Calves and Rear Ends

I discovered strong calves are really good for standing on tippy toes so I can watch the stripper cop on the stage at the bar. Being short is a curse but all those calf raises really paid off. The stripper was a sexy hunk but he didnt show it all *dissapointed face*. This was a special event as one of the owners, a chick, was having a hens/bachlorette night.

Also, does seeing a hot stripper make up for dinging a BMW? I put a minor dent in an old BMW while parallel parking. The guy was lovely about it. Good thing we're all qweens :D

"Scientists discover blue ring around Uranus"

BWAHAHAHAHA.

Accidental Date With A Semi Porn Star

Yeah, I went on date with this guy who has done some amateur porn movies, like 3 so far and has 2 more to go on his contract. And like, I din realise it was supposed to be a date date. I thought we could just be friends. I think he wants to pork me. Or, more accurately, wants to be porked by me. He wants to go to the gym with me so he can perv on me and spot me and stuff. The slut :P