Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Cookies = Love

How many cookies does it take to fill up a heart?

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Liz Lemon is the Everyman

Like Liz Lemon, I, too, have no plan-B.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Chocolate and orange sucks donkey dong!

There you are with a box of chocolates full of awesome and fuck yeah! You start eatin those fine mofo's and get a sweet ass chocolate hit on yo' taste buds. Nigga, you know what I'm talk bout!

Then BLAM! Chocolate and orange! It sucks like donkey dong! Screw you un-awesome chocolate maker!

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Warm cosy head

I wonder if Jewish yamakas are good to keep your head warm, you know, like a beanie.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Shervo's Monster

I wonder if anyone has actually seen Matt Shirvington's cock and balls in real life... Or if it's like the Loch Ness Monster: just one of those mythical things hinted at by shadows in blurry pictures.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Screw you Disney!

I just watched the start of Disney's Tangled.

Let met get this straight:

An elderly impoverished woman manages to protect an incredibly rare and beautiful flower for hundreds of years, and sustainably harvests its gifts with something as sweet as singing.

But then the spoiled king and queen, who are luxuriating in their gold and jewels while their subjects are living in abject poverty (if history is any guide), suddenly need the flower because the queen may be dying in childbirth (a situation no doubt incredibly common among the citizens she's oppressed).

So of course the rich king and queen have the rare flower torn from the earth and destroyed to get what they need. And in doing so, they are essentially sentence the old woman to death.

And now we are supposed to think the poor woman is baddie because the rich people have forced her to try and regain the discovery that was already hers, because she doesn't want to die? May I remind you that being old and/or poor, and not wanting to die, are not crimes!

(I stopped watching soon after that so we'll ignore the whole "imprisoning a girl in an isolated tower" thing. Anyway, they forced her into it!)

I knew Disney movies sent bad messages, but sheeesh! It's not the 1950s Disney! There's a reason you guys come distant second to Pixar these days...