Gym Camp

I was in my gay gym on the cross-trainer (which i call the camperciser cos it's so camp with your hands and feet wiggling like that) and watching Antiques Roadshow on the tv, and it occured to me how gay it all was. I love it! :D

My first radio appearance

I got to speak on the gay radio station last week and the lesbian host said i was the cuuuuutest support person at the station. Lesbians seem to find me pritty. She's the 3rd one to say so. Maybe I give off lesbian pheremones. *sniffs* Do I smell like flannel?

Living stones (no, not the kind on a man)

These livingstones are cool but I suspect I'm swayed by the hot man in a towel.

Calves and Rear Ends

I discovered strong calves are really good for standing on tippy toes so I can watch the stripper cop on the stage at the bar. Being short is a curse but all those calf raises really paid off. The stripper was a sexy hunk but he didnt show it all *dissapointed face*. This was a special event as one of the owners, a chick, was having a hens/bachlorette night.

Also, does seeing a hot stripper make up for dinging a BMW? I put a minor dent in an old BMW while parallel parking. The guy was lovely about it. Good thing we're all qweens :D

"Scientists discover blue ring around Uranus"

BWAHAHAHAHA.

Accidental Date With A Semi Porn Star

Yeah, I went on date with this guy who has done some amateur porn movies, like 3 so far and has 2 more to go on his contract. And like, I din realise it was supposed to be a date date. I thought we could just be friends. I think he wants to pork me. Or, more accurately, wants to be porked by me. He wants to go to the gym with me so he can perv on me and spot me and stuff. The slut :P

Lunacy has its benefits i suppose

"my penchant for surreptitiously reaching into my pants to cup my balls before picking up and replacing items of produce at the supermarket."

Photographic evidence

For what its worth here's evidence of my suffering for my body.

Also, while I was sitting in the doctor's waiting room bleeding from the head, another patient in the room decided to hit on my trainer. The bitch. He was all "oooooh, aren't you lucky to have someone so hot looking after you." And, "Why don't I accidentally fall down here so he can look after me." *Cue his pretend swoon.* The bitch.

If anyone is getting sex from my trainer cos of my injury, its gonna be ME.

I got bashed in the head with a barbell at the gym!

It was a tewwible tewwible accident! THREE STITCHES! Tho I'm telling everyone it was twenty stitches :P I was bleeding down my face and I threw up all over the gyms nice new carpet. The staff were lovely about it :D Plus I got to hold the hot trainers hand :D

Shiney Disco Balls

I'm going gay bowling tonight. I went a previous night but it got cancelled cos of Gay Pride March cos no one cept me turned up lol. Though I did get to meet Jamie, the blonde gay housemate from 2001 Big Brother. He's lovely in person and way skinner than he looks on tv.

Still... *thinks of gay qweens in bowling shoes and tossing bowling balls.* *shudder*